Motivational and inspirational writer, Bryan Hutchinson is the author of several books about life with ADHD including the highly acclaimed, best selling "One Boy′s Struggle: A Memoir" and the author of the hilarious eBook that went viral "10 Things I Hate about ADHD"

Inside My Room – With Undiagnosed ADHD

Inside My Room

Inside My Room

  

Out the window I can hear them play, the laughter, and the fun – the other kids from the neighborhood, playing, funning and laughing together. I don’t want to go outside. Trouble is out there. I want to stay here…

Inside my room.

My room is my castle, it is my spaceship, it is my universe, where I am the hero, I am the ruler – I can stay out of trouble in my room. My room is safe. I make too many mistakes. I don’t understand why I am so wrong, always wrong, always saying the wrong things. I have my room. My room is safe.

Inside my room.

It’s quiet. I am left alone. I can fly so high, I can soar anywhere I want to go – to the heavens so high. The universe is my home. I am the commander of a spaceship that travels the universe here and there all over and anywhere. I travel to so many worlds. Commander Mart I am – I am a hero! …

Inside my room.

I love the solitude. I love my fantasies of being good, of being okay and it’s my place where everybody likes me. In my room everyone is my friend! I visit different worlds; I meet strange new people who greet me with kindness and joy, yes they rejoice! Inside my room I don’t make any mistakes, I say all the right things – I can go as fast as I want to, flying here and there and never once do I hear the word STOP – I hear go, go go go! Faster – faster – go go go faster still – through the galaxies I soar! …

Inside my room.

There is no place like it in all of the world, no place, no space,  no desk confinement, no rules I don’t comprehend, no languages – I can do no wrong…

Inside my room.

I want to go outside and climb trees… I want to play on the playground… I can do those things…

Inside my room.

Why is the world so scary? Why do all the other kids have so much fun without me? They laugh, the play, they have so much fun and they smile with joyous joy – happy smiles all the time! They have no troubles, no fears, they are so very perfect and I am not… I don’t understand why I am so wrong – why can’t I be right – why can’t I be normal? But I am perfect…

Inside my room.

I am sorry… I’ll go…

Inside my room.

I won’t bother you…

Inside my room.

~Bryan

PS: Kids have a longing to be loved, they want to do their very best to please and be happy too. They want to make others happy, even if they have to stay inside their room. Having ADHD is not their fault.

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Mindy March 27, 2009 at 5:19 pm

Loved it! and will share with others..I still feel that comfort of being in “MY ROOM”. I will follow up with a post about that..

You sure we are not related? I guess we are in some ways!

Mel Taylor May 25, 2009 at 7:46 pm

That was amazingly familiar.

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