As unique and different as all people are, there is something that lurks in the darkness within each of us. It is always there, it is always waiting and it has a terrible power which is always aspiring to take control. It is patient. It doesn’t want to win. It wants to own and it can find ways to possess you completely, especially in moments of emotional confrontations, letdowns and self-pity.
It is self-doubt.
All people, regardless of race, color or creed, experience self-doubt. Some allow it to consume them and some allow it to motivate them, but too many do not realize it has any affect at all, because it lurks within their mind disguised as realistic thinking, and in disguise it becomes something far more dangerous and devious. It becomes proven and powerful…if you let it.
Self-doubt is too easy to prove, to verify, to validate – it is known as realistic and valid thinking. We are just being realistic, after all. In an ADHD mind it can become a way of life and consume as a cancer, leading to depression and worse. But, heed this warning: Self-doubt is not content to spread only within any one person afflicted; it seeks to spread to as many others as possible to become as a virus. Influence, after all, is what it seeks and as with most all things, it does not want to be alone.
Influence is the power of self-doubt. Without influence it is nothing more than mere caution which can be useful and supportive. In of itself, self-doubt does not carry overt powerful persuasion. Such persuasion must be developed and nurtured. It does this by using our mistakes, our blunders and self-pity to its advantage, helping those things consume us, to make us give in to them. The ADHD mind is ripe for this, because our blunders and mistakes are often repeated.
We can start to measure and manage our level of self-doubt by identifying those people we surround ourselves with who support it, and realize that it is only a tool which has gained too much power.
Here’s what I think:
- We are better than we think we are. As humans we are born with the capacity to heal and improve. Every day is a new day and brings with it not only new challenges, but wonderful new opportunities.
- Your opinion matters and you have the decisive say in what goes on in your life. Too often people want to control another’s belief or change world opinion to their own, but this has never worked and will never work because we are born as individuals, with individual thoughts, beliefs, opinions and expectations.
- You are unique and there is no one else like you. You may relate to others, you may have a connection in common with others and you may agree with others, but still, you are you, incomparable and special.
- You can achieve great things, wondrous things – not just if you want to, but if you look inside and honestly go with what you believe in and not what you may think others expect of you.
- When others feel awful and worried, you can lift their spirits with a kind word and encourage them with a smile. Sometimes that’s all it takes and you have the power to give.
~Bryan