Comments on: My Normal Mask by NerdyMommy – Hiding Covering Masking ADHD Symptoms http://www.adderworld.com/blog1/2008/08/15/my-normal-mask-by-nerdymommy-%e2%80%93-hiding-covering-masking-adhd-symptoms/ Bryan Hutchinson's thoughts about ADD ADHD Attention Deficit Disorder and other stuff Sun, 06 May 2012 01:22:33 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.3 By: Leesa http://www.adderworld.com/blog1/2008/08/15/my-normal-mask-by-nerdymommy-%e2%80%93-hiding-covering-masking-adhd-symptoms/comment-page-1/#comment-6786 Leesa Wed, 20 Aug 2008 19:10:02 +0000 http://adderworld.com/blog1/?p=528#comment-6786 This is true what you said Bryan, "It’s just that with ADHD some things are a little more complicated and not completely within our control. " How often I forget that there are things that are not completely within my control. I think I forget that and think that I should be able to "fix" myself and then those things would be better. On top of everything else I realize that I'm also a perfectionist! In so many areas I have enormous self control and discipline, more so then most non ADDERS I know. My life is not a wreck in spite of my shortcomings. IN other areas, that seem so easy I fail because I lose interest in like 5 minutes!!!!! This is true what you said Bryan, “It’s just that with ADHD some things are a little more complicated and not completely within our control. ”

How often I forget that there are things that are not completely within my control. I think I forget that and think that I should be able to “fix” myself and then those things would be better.

On top of everything else I realize that I’m also a perfectionist! In so many areas I have enormous self control and discipline, more so then most non ADDERS I know. My life is not a wreck in spite of my shortcomings.

IN other areas, that seem so easy I fail because I lose interest in like 5 minutes!!!!!

]]> By: Bryan http://www.adderworld.com/blog1/2008/08/15/my-normal-mask-by-nerdymommy-%e2%80%93-hiding-covering-masking-adhd-symptoms/comment-page-1/#comment-6742 Bryan Wed, 20 Aug 2008 03:46:42 +0000 http://adderworld.com/blog1/?p=528#comment-6742 I think I know what you mean Leesa. Try thinking of it like this: There are areas in which we all would like to improve and it does not matter if we have ADHD or not. It's just that with ADHD some things are a little more complicated and not completely within our control. "Mask" isn't the best term to use, because that usually means to hide something. When we think of hiding something, we think of lying and cheating. It's kind of the same with pretending and acting, both of those indicate doing something which isn't truth. However, those are good visual terms for getting through to the ADHD mind. What they really mean is to condition the mind with new habits by visualizing and actualizing. So, I agree having a mask, sort of speak, is like hiding who we really are. In my book I talk about visualizing and actualizing – that is what I prefer, because it trains our minds to see what we want and move forward in that direction, which also utilizes our hyper focusing ability. We should not have to wear 'masks' per se; however, if we can act a certain way, at a certain time with this 'mask' then it stands to reason that we can learn the traits we are using while wearing the 'mask'. That’s what we should explore. If however, we see the mask as a totally separate lie, and not as an extension of ourselves and recognize that what we are doing while the mask is on is really ‘us’, then yes that can make us think we are simply not good enough. Whenever we ‘do’ something with the mask on, the reality is, it is still us doing it and not some figment of our imagination, and so, the abilities, traits etc… we have while wearing the mask is coming from within and is something we can harness. Sometimes the way we think of something has more power than anything else. I know, because I was treated for depression before I was treated for ADHD. Of course, you already know that because you read my book and wrote that wonderful comment, which I so much appreciate, on the other post :) ~Bryan I think I know what you mean Leesa. Try thinking of it like this: There are areas in which we all would like to improve and it does not matter if we have ADHD or not. It’s just that with ADHD some things are a little more complicated and not completely within our control. “Mask” isn’t the best term to use, because that usually means to hide something. When we think of hiding something, we think of lying and cheating. It’s kind of the same with pretending and acting, both of those indicate doing something which isn’t truth. However, those are good visual terms for getting through to the ADHD mind. What they really mean is to condition the mind with new habits by visualizing and actualizing.

So, I agree having a mask, sort of speak, is like hiding who we really are. In my book I talk about visualizing and actualizing – that is what I prefer, because it trains our minds to see what we want and move forward in that direction, which also utilizes our hyper focusing ability. We should not have to wear ‘masks’ per se; however, if we can act a certain way, at a certain time with this ‘mask’ then it stands to reason that we can learn the traits we are using while wearing the ‘mask’. That’s what we should explore. If however, we see the mask as a totally separate lie, and not as an extension of ourselves and recognize that what we are doing while the mask is on is really ‘us’, then yes that can make us think we are simply not good enough. Whenever we ‘do’ something with the mask on, the reality is, it is still us doing it and not some figment of our imagination, and so, the abilities, traits etc… we have while wearing the mask is coming from within and is something we can harness.

Sometimes the way we think of something has more power than anything else. I know, because I was treated for depression before I was treated for ADHD. Of course, you already know that because you read my book and wrote that wonderful comment, which I so much appreciate, on the other post :)

~Bryan

]]> By: Leesa http://www.adderworld.com/blog1/2008/08/15/my-normal-mask-by-nerdymommy-%e2%80%93-hiding-covering-masking-adhd-symptoms/comment-page-1/#comment-6728 Leesa Tue, 19 Aug 2008 22:29:11 +0000 http://adderworld.com/blog1/?p=528#comment-6728 Yes, I TRY to have a normal mask. I say try because I don't think I'm very good at it anymore. I used to be alot better but I get the feeling that ADD is progressive and if not treated and given consideration, it gets worse. I don't think the mask is a good thing because it teaches us that the way we are normally isn't good enough, isn't acceptable. Sad thing is that a lot of time that is the truth. For me some of my ADD behavior is unacceptable and I already know this, I don't need to be told. Yes, I TRY to have a normal mask. I say try because I don’t think I’m very good at it anymore. I used to be alot better but I get the feeling that ADD is progressive and if not treated and given consideration, it gets worse.

I don’t think the mask is a good thing because it teaches us that the way we are normally isn’t good enough, isn’t acceptable. Sad thing is that a lot of time that is the truth. For me some of my ADD behavior is unacceptable and I already know this, I don’t need to be told.

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