Comments on: Having ADHD Justifies a Negative Attitude!

By: Bryan Hutchinson

Bryan Hutchinson — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 10:21:35 +0000

Your right, Matt. We can never get away from the “gateway” people. There will always be someone, somewhere who wants to influence our perspective; some are obvious while others are not. However, the best way I have found to counter this is to spend as much time with more beneficial, encouraging, supportive people as possible. That way when you are around those “gateway” people they will not be as influential. Also it is important to remember, wherever we are whatever situation we are in “This too shall pass”. You’re doing what you can right now and that’s important and positive, too!

Bryan

By: Bryan Hutchinson

Bryan Hutchinson — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 10:12:14 +0000

Thanks for sharing, Judy!

By: Bryan Hutchinson

Bryan Hutchinson — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 10:09:40 +0000

I wish you a brilliant and fantastic day, too! I think there’s an additional problem when we are brought up around negativity and how it affects us all of our lives – and that’s when we step away from it or try to distance ourselves from those who try to influence us with their negativity, it’s not easy and sometimes causes increased stress and anxiety especially if you’ve succumbed to their bullying in the past and will have no more of it. However, in order to be free of it sometimes it is important to move on and find positive supporters that care about your mental well being.

Bryan

By: Bryan Hutchinson

Bryan Hutchinson — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 09:56:43 +0000

Rebecca, I am very happy the post inspired and motivated you so much and in such a positive way! And I agree, there are always those who will ‘understand’ one’s plight and not only allow us, but encourage us to wallow in our negativity. Reading blog posts or forum posts, it’s easy to identify who those people are, but in day to day life off-line, sometimes we have to be a little more discerning and aware.

Bests,
Bryan

By: Matt H

Matt H — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 10:39:15 +0000

I get this totally, I am always at the trying stage. It reminds me of people who diet or give up smoking, it is a never ending struggle that one must uphold for ever. I cannot always get away from what I call ‘gateway people’, the ones who send me into a negative spiral that cripples my performance and even my life; mainly because they are senior employees where I work. I always have a choice, leave work or take the matter further (which I am doing at the moment). Gateway people project a hugely positive ‘can do’ attitude, but are negative towards my difficulties – I am currently trying to get this realised as a diversity issue whilst being managed into the ground. I think we need empathy, not critiscism based on normal peoples expectations.

By: Sarah Gogstetter

Sarah Gogstetter — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 22:48:49 +0000

I totally agree Bryan!

By: Bryan Hutchinson

Bryan Hutchinson — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 16:37:30 +0000

Hi Pete,

I am not quite sure. ADD is a rather serious disorder and does cause a lot of hardships and some are challenged more than others. I think what you might be referring to is when people discuss ADHD as if there is no hope or no possibilities and for that they have no chance to succeed or improve?

For some it is just a phase and for other they simply haven’t found their way yet and talking about it helps them. And for some, the challenges have shaped their attitude and outlook so much that change becomes nearly impossible (or so it seems). But there are many types and many points of view.

Understanding and empathy go a long way, I believe. And if you are like me, you’ve been there too so perhaps consider what helped you and how you might be able to pass that on?

Bests,
Bryan

By: Pete Sapper

Pete Sapper — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 15:52:09 +0000

I’ll do you one better and say that the vast majority of ADD’ers embrace the type of victim mentality that makes the handful of us who refuse to use the diagnosis as an excuse sick to our stomachs.

This is why I quit addressing the ADD community as a whole. The fact that people were buring their entire identities in this whole “but I have ADD!” nonsense made be ill, especially knowing that there are people out there with far more severe challenges who still succeed in spite of them.

By: Rebecca

Rebecca — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 15:50:13 +0000

Bryan: This was AWESOME! I already have a very positive attitude about my ADHD. I LOVE my ADHD! I fully encompass it and I seriously have never wished I did not have it. I went through a long time where I was undiagnosed which caused me some angst but I was freed and liberated the day I was officially given the diagnosis. I should say validated too as I “thought” I had it but other docs dismissed a grown adult truly having it.

Your article spoke volumes to me as I related it to more than ADHD. I fully accept my ADHD and I see it as more of an advantage. But your article applies to other areas in my life that I often justify negativity–especially in my choices to be healthy. I justify being overweight because I am busy or I am so tired or I blame it on my ADHD, yada, yada, yada, therefore I cannot choose to eat healthy or to do simple exercises. I find people who will “understand” my plight (and there are many) and let me wallow in my negativity. I don’t always “see” it as negativity but when I truly look at it and shine that bright light on it, it is negativity and very unhealthy physically, mentally, and spiritually.

Thank you for your article, Bryan. You have helped to open my eyes. I am inspired to make healthier, better, and positive choices in my life all around. I am not going to “try”–I AM making wise choices starting NOW. I need to give myself a dose or 20 doses of tough love that I give others and just say “NO EXCUSES!” I love myself and respect myself enough to do that.

Thank you, Bryan!

By: Judy

Judy — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 14:57:12 +0000

I thank you for expressing perfectly my own thinking on this subject. Couldn’t have said it better myself.
This being said, I have re-blogged your post to my own blog http://addpositively.wordpress.com
You are one of the best!
Thank you again:)