I was extremely excited to read Buzz to say the least. I had heard of the book and had considered ordering it several times, but as you may know I have ADHD. Sometimes I forget to order stuff that I want, no matter how much I want it! Well, a short while back I met Katherine Ellison and before I knew it we were emailing each other back and forth discussing ADHD and our memoirs. I asked Katherine if she would like to give a signed copy of her book away on ADDer World, the ADHD Social Network. She replied that she would love to and sent me a copy right away. Uhm, again remember that I have ADHD, because I gave Katherine a goofed up address the book went back to her and she nicely, and ever so gently, let me know. I admitted my goof and corrected it (I wonder if I reminded her of her son, Buzz, in that instance?). She sent Buzz once again and I finally received it and have read the spellbinding, delightful book. However, it took me a while to actually start reading it. The book’s design is so captivating that it took me a while to stop admiring it. Yes, I know, distracted much? ADHD!

Buzz is a wonderful, fascinating book. Reading it was an incredible experience, as Katherine spares no details. I could literally feel her emotions through each written word. What was so fascinating to me was to read the details and experiences from a parent’s perspective. It revealed all the frustrations, the love and the concern that a mother has for her child, no matter how perplexing that child’s behavior may be. At the heart of this book is one mother’s advocacy for her child, trying everything she can in order to get a grip of her own ADHD, while also doing her best to find ways to help her child’s circumstances affected by not only his ADHD, but hers too.

Buzz is a very important book and as I’ve said so many times, the most helpful books I have read concerning ADHD have been from people sharing their real life experiences. We can all learn from each other and Buzz is one of those books that when you stop reading it, you keep thinking about it. I can’t recommend this book enough, especially for any parent or teacher of a child with ADHD. We can read every self-help book ever written about ADHD, but to really gain an intimate understanding and find ways that work in real-life scenarios, in my opinion, there is no other type of book that compares to the literal, unvarnished truth of someone’s experience.

If you have not read Buzz yet, do yourself a favor and pick up a copy soon. However, be warned that it is absolutely engrossing all the way through, from the front cover to the back cover! Next month this signed copy will be given away on ADDer World, the ADHD social network, so you might get lucky and win it. Still, don’t wait, go get yourself a copy of this fabulous book today!

Bryan

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When you sign up to be notified about his book’s release you will receive a white paper about ADHD medications, here’s the outline of that paper:

• This paper is a comprehensive outline of my forthcoming book
• I want to keep you informed when The Guide becomes available – with no obligation to purchase.
• You will be better able to understand ADHD meds with this white paper the day you receive it.
• It contains multiple links to the many posts and references I have been speaking and writing about for the last 3 years at CorePsych Blog
• Including specific notes on the evolving diagnosis of ADHD
• Including multiple notes on comorbid diagnosis and ADHD
• Including specific notes and reference resources on drug-drug interactions
• Including specific durations of each stimulant medication
•  Including specific notes on the Therapeutic Window to use with your doc
• Including suggestions about how to work with your medical team

Go to this link to sign up.

I do not personally endorse or take any ADHD medication. I am posting this as a personal favor to Dr. Parker, to help get the word out. I believe this to be very important for the many lives in need and affected by this often confusing area of treatment for ADHD. Chuck demystifies the ADHD medication mystery for you and me!

~Bryan

PS: Dr. Charles Parker is a member of our ADDer World ADHD Social Network. You may leave a comment for him on his page here. Talk directly to one of the doctors on the front lines of ADHD treatment. Be sure to find out where and when he is having his next keynote address and maybe you could let your doctor know about it.

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New FREE eBook:

8 Steps How to hyper Super Focus at Will!

This eBook is for anyone who wants to learn how to Super Focus at will! Especially for those people in sports, school or just need more control of their focus. ADHD not required!

Thanks to a special article about hyper focusing, I recently published in ADDitude magazine (fall 2009), I have received many emails asking me how I learned to hyper focus at will and make it a beneficial trait I can call upon whenever I want. To clarify, I have used the term ‘hyper’ because it is most recognizable; however, I now personally call it SUPER Focusing. When focusing is not within one’s control, I believe it should be defined as ’hyper’. Although, when we purposely aim to achieve the state of being ‘hyper’ Focused at will, when we in fact control it to our advantage, the results can be extremely rewarding and that is SUPER Focus!

This eBook is not specifically about managing particular traits of ADHD, but about harnessing your potential to Super Focus at will, whether you have ADHD or not. Many of you have been in the zone, when the stars have seemingly aligned, hyper focusing at one time or another. It is my ambition to help you achieve super focus by design!

You can right click the above link to my new eBook and ‘save as’ to save to your computer. Please feel free to pass on this eBook to anyone who may benefit.

If you have not read my article about hyper focusing in the fall ’09 edition of ADDitude Magazine, you can get yourself a copy here.

~Bryan

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My Latest FREE eBook is now available:

 “10 Things I Hate About ADHD!”

Please download, save and share it with friends.

~Bryan

You can also right click on the link and ‘save target as’, to download to your computer to keep and share.

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Paulo Coelho's Brida

Do you believe? Do you believe in the one, the only, that special someone? Is there such a thing as a soulmate for each of us? If so, is it possible to go a life time without ever finding your soulmate? Or, is it possible to meet your soulmate and not realize it, passing by as two ships in the dark night?

In Paulo Coelho’s Brida, an exceptional novel about finding one’s soulmate, Coelho describes finding one’s soulmate by taking risks, by making mistakes and by being with the wrong people until you find your soulmate. The other way he describes of finding one’s soulmate is by entering a state of trance in which one can see a bright spot of light over the shoulder of one’s soulmate.

Paulo Coelho is known for taking complex ideas and putting his insightfully thoughtful twists on them. He wrote The Alchemist after all. (Spoiler) And if you have read The Alchemist, you know where the riches were all along – right where the story began. Life is like that, if we slow down and listen to our inner desires closely enough, we can find our answers. The problem comes with the calming down and removing our personal inner critical rational analyzer (whew!).

Brida was an intense read for me because the real twist, at least for me, was that Brida had the desire to become a witch and find her soulmate through spirituality. As with any Paulo Coelho book, you may be contemplating a long time after you are finished reading. I love books that do that, which has made me a huge Coelho fan!

In life we make a lot of mistakes through trial and error, we bang our heads against the proverbial wall time and time again, repeating our mistakes as if our inner record is broken. And we continuously ask the same questions over and over again. Why did I do that? Why me? Why can’t I get it right?

Nobody likes me! I am not worth loving! These statements come afterwards, because, what other answer could there possibly be?

Desperation leads to friction, friction leads to confusion, confusion leads to further desperation and this leads to feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness.

It’s the tricks of the mind we create and put ourselves through, never realizing that we are doing this by allowing too many outside influences to have control of what we think we are looking for – i.e. possessions, style, looks, education, job, etc… none of which, in the grand scheme of things, has anything to do with finding one’s soulmate.

On Paulo Coelho’s personal blog he asks a very good question: Would you try to find your soulmate through magic or by taking risks, making mistakes?

Some may jump to the conclusion, due to the way society hits you with hard knocks and you must claw your way back up again and again, that taking risks and making mistakes is the obvious answer.

Finding one’s soulmate, to me, is about finding our self - understanding our self to the point that we are comfortable with who we are and love our self from within without the need for external assurance. How can one truly be loved by someone else, or give the same love in return, if we are not comfortable with and love our self first?

~Bryan

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Win a Free Autographed Copy of Nancy Ratey’s The Disorganized Mind on our  ADDer World ADHD Social Network 

Can Be Yours!

Nancy has generously sent ADDer World a personally signed copy of her book for the ADDer World giveaway drawing contest! You can read more about her on her website NancyRatey.com and I reviewed her book here. Nancy is also a member of our ADDer World ADHD Social Network, you can check out her page there and also, if you like, leave her a little ‘hello‘ comment. Thank you Nancy!

Member’s names will be put into a box and randomly selected to choose the winner.

How to get your name in the box:

1) Write a blog post, or, forum post, also replying to any blog or forum post on our ADDer World ADHD Social Network will be considered an entry into the drawing box. This means that each time you do any of the above your name will be placed into the drawing box, yes, multiple times; however, it only takes one entry to win and only one entry can win! The more your name is in the box, the better your chances are. However, all posts must be original in nature and not copied from your personal blog etc… I do consider my personal blog a part of ADDer World, therefore, any member’s comments made here will be inputted for the contest too – just be sure to use the same email address that you have signed up with.

2) If you would like to double your chances, any NEW member who uses your name as a referral will equal your name going into the box TWICE for that single referral.

This contest will run from 20 May until 14 June and the winner will be announced 15 June via email and on the front page of our ADDer World ADHD Social Network! New members who join during this time will also be included into the drawing via the above rules. Only members of our ADDer World Social Network will be included in the drawing box.

If you have any questions please post them here.

I have some wonderful, caring authors who have agreed to sign and giveaway one of their books on ADDer World for you! So, if you don’t win this time (and who says you won’t?), you will have a chance next time too!! I am already very excited about these fantastic authors who are willing to generously donate their work for our efforts here on ADDer World!

If you have a blog, or, website please let your readers know about this contest (you can use the share this button below)! Remember, referrals count twice! Please spread the word and please let me know about it.

Are you excited?

Remember, you can’t win if you don’t play!

Thanks,

Bryan

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I came across a delightful book the other day called Gluten-Free Girl by Shauna James Ahern. As some of you already know, I am allergic to wheat. That’s no fun and keeping wheat out of my diet is a chore, but, worse still is that I am also Gluten sensitive. Once you start trying to eliminate Gluten from the diet it sure can seem like eating food is suddenly tragic! However, that’s not really the case. The truth is, once I started to eliminate Gluten, I start to eat so much healthier! Contrary to popular belief, eating healthy doesn’t taste half bad; actually, after a while I discovered REAL food tastes much better than the over processed crud I had been eating for so long. It’s really no wonder I had always been feeling so grumpy and lethargic at times, especially when waking the next morning after a late night dinner of cheeseburgers (I do miss them, don’t be a hater)! I used to have the most difficult time waking up in the morning, not only was I grumpy, but, I was always still so darn tired, I would need 4 or 5 sodas just to get my groove on, if I could turn it on at all! Oh, by the way, I do not drink soda anymore either. It’s really no wonder I had such issues and my ADHD symptoms were being extra provoked by my lousy diet.

I came across Shauna’s book the other day and the words Gluten Free caught my eyes. I skipped the ‘girl’ part – I am a guy after all. Living Gluten Free has been a pain in my ‘you know what’ so reading about someone else doing it was of serious interest to me. I am glad I picked up Shauna’s book. She’s got a brilliant way of bringing living Gluten Free into a positive light and has useful tips for eating right and tastefully so. If you’re Gluten sensitive or have Celiac Disease this is a ‘must have’ book and should make you feel much better about the way we are living with regard to being Gluten Free! Now, the thing is, I don’t have to avoid Gluten all of the time, like folks with Celiac Disease (bless your hearts); however, I willingly admit that whenever I do eat Gluten on accident I know it within a few short hours! To me, that’s a strong hint to stay as far away from Gluten as possible. Shauna’s book is the result of writing her blog. Yep, she’s got a pleasant, positive blog about living Gluten Free too. Be sure to check it out here.

Dare I say living Gluten Free is a gift?! I dare! It’s been a wonderful gift for me and my over all well being. Milk and Gluten are curse words in my dictionary! Darn them! Remember though, I am also allergic to Milk, so that doesn’t mean you should not drink it if you are not allergic to it.

~Bryan

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I was listening to an audio book recently: Challenge to Succeed by Jim Rohn. I recommend it to anyone interested in self improvement. In the audio Jim makes many good points about wealth, health and state of being. The most important point he makes is this: “What you don’t know will hurt you.”

Any late diagnosed ADDer will tell you that this is too true. What if we had known 10 years, or, 20 years earlier? What if our parents had known and we were diagnosed as children? What a difference would that have made? We can deal with ‘what if’s’ all day long, but, what about today? Today there is a wealth of information available in books and on the internet. There is no reason we cannot self-educate ourselves about our condition, not in an information packed world such as ours.

As anyone knows that reads my blog posts and books, I am for positive thinking, affirmations, medication and having heroes to look up to. And yet, above all of everything else, education about ADHD is the absolute most important method to improve one’s quality of life and situation with concern to ADHD. When I talk to people who are thriving and have overcome tremendous difficulties there are always two things which they identify as their keys to success: Self-education and a PMA Positive Mental Attitude. For those who have success with medication, that becomes 3 keys; however, self-education is always first. Medication can’t teach or instill new coping skills. PMA – a positive mental attitude is developed by the more you know and understand, the more personal stories about ADHD you read, the more you learn about current research and the latest strategies and by helping others! There are books, audio books, Teleseminars, podcasts, blogs and so much more available to you, at your fingertips!

“If I had known…” Don’t let that be your statement, put it in the past. Start now, if you haven’t already, and if you are reading this I am assuming you have already started. I am telling you, the more you understand, the more you know… it will make a world of difference.

“Schooling will get you a job; Self-education will get you a life. – Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.” Jim Rohn

For the person who refuses to self-educate with or without medication, nothing else will help them! Some have told me that they can’t read just one book at a time and that frustrates them. Why? Who made the rule you must read only one book at a time? When we went to school and had 6 classes in a day, how many books were we required to read at any given time? It’s okay to read more than one book at a time, its okay to listen to yet another book, or podcast, or teleseminar on the way to work. It’s not okay to do none of those things! I am telling you, we can’t rely on medication alone, or, PMA alone! It is being proven day in and day out that awareness of and self-education of ADHD is improving lives! Yes, some are pretty ticked off about having it and yes, some people hate and loathe ADHD, but, even so, to deny the existence of and not learn as much as one can about ADHD will just make things more difficult, not only for yourself, but, also for those around you.

“What you don’t know will hurt you.” Jim Rohn

~Bryan

PS: I do support medication and try to avoid writing about my personal experience with medication, because, I do not want to deter anyone from seeking proper treatment which could include medication. With that said, I had a very bad experience with medication and after nearly 3 years I am still recovering. If I had self-educated myself about medication for ADHD and self-educated myself about side effects and withdrawal syndrome I would have known that I was taking medication NOT designed for ADHD and I would have known that going cold-turkey off of it could lead to my current situation with discontinuation syndrome. Now, answer me this (I know I can’t change the past), – would that information have been valuable to me before taking the medication? Yes, I can blame others, doctors or an industry, or, I can try to make others believe medication is destructive. Well, since I don’t agree with those things, let’s move on. Truth be told, I have another personal experience with medication which has also been detrimental and which, for my own reasons, I will not share. However, I have since discovered I could have learned all I had wanted or needed to know about the medication if I had chosen to self-educate myself. Every bit of information that could have given me an informed personal choice was already available on the internet. That’s all I am saying – self-educate. “But, Bryan, it’s not your fault… you didn’t know…” That’s the point exactly. Uninformed decisions with consequences can be pretty unforgiving and lasting. Thankfully, Dr. Charles Parker is writing a book about ADHD medication which will help explain the factors we need to know. How did I make it without medication? That’s already been written.

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The answer

The Answer by John Assaraf & Murray Smith should be required reading for anyone with ADHD. It’s rare that I come across such a book which is not specifically written for ADDers. However, reading through it, I sure get the sense it was written for the ADHD community! I will go so far as to say, folks with ADHD will probably ‘get’ this book while reading it far sooner than those without ADHD.

A friend of mine sent me The Answer a few weeks back and asked me to read it and let her know if I felt the same way about it and if I did, to please write about it. I do, and more! Holy Smoke Stacks do I ever!

Top achievers in any field have followed their innate talents, or what they consider their gifts. They do not pay any attention to their weaknesses, except for identifying what they are (ultra important) and making sure they do not work in the direction of their weaknesses. If you’re one who believes that strengthening your weakness is the key to success, well, that’s more likely a key to mediocrity rather than success. You will never find top performers who are working in the field of their greatest weaknesses. The exception to this rule is if what was thought of as a weakness due to fear or anxiety turns out to be a strength, a hidden talent or ‘gift’.

The Answer has been written to be a companion to The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, or, more directly The Answer to The Secret. And that’s exactly what it is; however, now that I have read it, it sure explains why so many people have read The Secret and have not been able to model their behaviors after The Secret’s philosophy.  Too many have read The Secret and then believe that whatever they are imagining will just come to them. That works and it doesn’t work. The Answer clearly explains that one must get off his or her butt and get to it (their words) and how to get to it. For example, if you’re visualizing becoming a writer, it won’t help if you don’t start writing. However, maybe the hold back is what you’re writing about and not the writing itself. You can be the greatest writer in the world, but, if you don’t want to write about a certain subject, it’s still going to be difficult. Does this sound a little familiar to you?

People with ADHD are always being put in situations, ever since grade school, to do things in ways their mind simply isn’t wired to do and they fail. Maybe the child with ADHD has a great talent for drawing, or, hey, how about swimming, but, before that child can ever get to an art class or swimming elective which will explore such a talent, he or she must go through years of learning things which his or her mind has great difficulty in learning. By the time the child gets the opportunity to explore their innate talent, it’s often way too late, negative thinking and failure from doing what their mind isn’t wired to do has created what was a promising talent into something totally the opposite. Negativity and belief in failure has set in already and all too often therapy becomes required. Great way to start off… right? I personally believe this is what Dr. Hallowell and others like Dr. Lara Honos-Webb are attempting to help parents and adult ADDers with, when they talk and write about the gifts of ADHD, by finding those talents and traits which have become dormant due to neglect for various reasons. Get your head out of the clouds! The Answer maintains we should get our heads BACK into the clouds! Haven’t I been saying that already??? lol

Think about it – what if Michael Phelps had not been allowed to take advantage of his talent for swimming early? What if he was not surrounded by great coaches and mentors ever since he was a small child with ADHD? What if he had been forced to wait… would he have become the Olympic Swimmer we know of today? I would hazard to guess that it would have been far more difficult to start ten years later. Sure, he could have dreamed about and visualized himself swimming while he waited, but, without physical application to go along with those visualized efforts… and we wonder… (just a side note, I am also sure his mother didn’t raise him to believe his ADHD was a curse… just saying)

Okay, I got a little off target here, The Answer’s is a clear, step by step explanation with plenty of examples of how The Secret works and why it works. John Assaraf, is a key member behind The Secret, therefore, for The Secret followers, he’s an original team member who helped bring out The Secret! What would it take to make all your dreams come true? That’s the question. And most people don’t want to ask that question of themselves, with good reason! You will be asking yourself this question after reading The Answer! You will be asking that question after the first chapter!

Goals! I have always had trouble with goals. Write them, be clear about them, we need them, goals take you to the next level etc etc etc… so much has been written about goals, you would think there is nothing more to write. Remember, I have an ADHD mind and goals are the bane of an ADDer’s existence! Not for me, not anymore!!! The Answer has provided me perfect examples, which my ADHD mind readily adapted! For the first time I clearly wrote out my personal specific goals! It feels really good to read them over and know that I can achieve each and every one of them and not just half hazardly dream about them!

I highly recommend The Answer to the ADHD community!  

~Bryan

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I highly recommend several books which are written specifically about ADHD. My book, One Boy’s Struggle: A Memoir, is one of those books, – It is about my life growing up with Undiagnosed ADD and how I eventually overcame my struggles to become successful and happy in my own right - my story and the lessons learned from the hindsight of my life thus far. I have had a many ups and downs in my life, twisted roads and seemingly endless loops of taking steps forward only to find myself at the start again, or further behind. In order to get better and overcome many of my struggles I had to give up on certain things and some things I had to remain steadfast with, even when it seemed the worst was still to come.

The Dip by Seth Godin is a book I recommend for ADDers as highly as I do certain books written specifically about ADHD. (Seth doesn’t have ADHD, but he could have fooled me! *Correction: Seth reveals in the comments below that he does indeed have ADHD) The Dip is a motivational and inspiring book about knowing when to give up, yes, give up, let go and when to not give up, – no, do not give up and stick with it, making it through The Dip. ADDers have a tendency to give up and berate themselves for giving up, but what if we should give up on certain things? Giving up isn’t always bad or as terrible as we perceive it, sometimes it is the right thing to do. On the contrary though, there are things which seem difficult and trying, but we don’t want to give up on them, no matter what and we stick with them even when others would tell us to stop, try something else and move on. But, when should we give up, and when should we stick with it? That, my friends and neighbors, is what The Dip is about. It is an extraordinary book, which in of itself seems, and is, simplicity itself, but then again, simplicity always is the most confounding and complex reality… isn’t it?  ~Bryan

A Member of the Interactive ADDer World, our community for those with ADHD and related to ADHD in some way, recently posted a review there about Seth Godin’s book, The Dip. I have copied that review here for you to read and enjoy, if you have not joined and become a member of ADDer World yet, here’s the review:

Godin, Seth. The Dip A LITTLE BOOK THAT TEACHES YOU WHEN TO QUIT (AND WHEN TO STICK). Copyright: Do You Zoom, Inc. 2007. A review by GF (member of ADDer World Community website)

“Quitters never win and winners never quit,” according to the late football coaching great, Vince Lombardi. “Bad advice,” asserts author, founder and CEO of Squidoo, and well-known television and business blog personality, Seth Godin. Furthermore, Godin continues, “Winners quit all the time. They just quit the right stuff at the right time.”

Being the best in the world at that one thing that matters most to you is seriously important. Our minds, unfortunately, especially our ADDer minds, are capable of infinite distractions and excuse making. Who has not heard of someone described as a ‘Jack of all trades and master of none’? Like Jack, perhaps you prefer to be thought of as well rounded, rather than just an excellent salesperson, house framer, or teacher.

However, ask yourself what qualities you would want in a physician if you were newly diagnosed with liver cancer. Would it comfort you knowing that your doctor always finishes at the top of his age group in the New York Marathon? Can play three musical instruments rather well? Or enjoys his friends’ compliments as a talented sushi chef?

Most likely you would you choose someone ranked by her peers as one of the top three liver cancer specialist in the state. Sure, a music background may make for smoother bedside manners, but what you really want is the physician who will give you the best shot at a long and healthy life.

The reward for being best in the world is exponential. Think about it: being the best is rare. It is scarce. Gold, not manure, is priced in hundreds of dollars an ounce. The world richly rewards scarcity, not abundant mediocrity. Jack is never rewarded. This book is about tough love.

What, then, is the dip? It is the boring, difficult, inconvenient time after the excitement, positive feedback, and the fun of a new relationship or project has worn thin. The dip is drudgery; it is an artifice society creates to KEEP YOU OUT of the inner circle. The dip creates scarcity, and scarcity creates value, says Godin.

By determining which dip is the right challenge to stick with and then leaning into the dip or obstacle, you may succeed from your perseverance, when others find it easier to quit. What was Woody Allen’s secret for success? Just show up (having a talent for comedic writing did not hurt him, either).

Whether it concerns finding a loving mate, gathering power, or building wealth, we live in a competitive society. The system depends upon us, the majority (the average), sticking with the wrong goals and quitting the right goals when we encounter the dip.

If the goal is hollow, Godin believes in quitting early. Most people are afraid to quit. We continue in meaningless jobs and deplorable relationships because we are afraid to take a calculated risk. Instead, we settle for mediocrity and expressing present frustrations.

Here are the author’s “Three Questions To Ask Before Quitting”:

QUESTION 1: AM I PANICKING?
Quitting is not the same as panicking. Panic is never premeditated. Panic attacks us, it grabs us, it is in the moment.

QUESTION 2: WHO AM I TRYING TO INFLUENCE?
If you are considering quitting, it’s almost certainly because you’re not being successful at your current attempt at influence.

QUESTION 3: WHAT SORT OF MEASURABLE PROGRESS AM I MAKING?
If you’re trying to succeed in a job or a relationship or at a task, you’re either moving forward, falling behind, or standing still. There are only three choices.

When the goal is meaningful and worth pursuing, then expect the dip, gather your resources and mentors (ADD coaches, perhaps?), and prepare yourself for a difficult slog. Having a scarce and valued skill – being the best – and taking pride in the effort to be the best will get you noticed and rewarded.

By GF, a member of ADDer World the interactive community for those with ADHD, their families, mentors and friends.

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