I think it is very important that we learn to think positive and use positive thinking and visualizing positive results to cope with ADD ADHD. I talk a lot about positive thinking and visualizing positive results here on my blog and thanks to years of therapy I have learned to do that. The point I want to make is that ADD ADHD causes a lot of devastation in many lives, the symptoms and traits have caused numerous struggles in my own life.
Learning to cope with ADHD is a lifetime’s effort. There is no cure and there is no medication which will cure ADHD. I am not against medication because I believe it does help some people, but it does not help everyone. Some cannot afford the medication, so for them learning to cope is that much more critical. The point I would like to make is that with or without medication children and adults must still learn coping skills. I often worry that the message that ADHD is a gift gets confused with the reality that ADHD is a condition which can be very difficult to get under control. There are positive traits to ADHD and many can be considered as gifts, once a person gets the condition under reasonable control one can start to use the positive benefits of ADHD to their advantage – at that point ADHD is a gift for many of us.
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A book I recommend to many parents is “The Gift of ADHD Activity Book: 101 Ways to Turn Your Child’s Problems into Strengths” by Dr. Lara, Honos-Webb. The reason I recommend this book is because she offers suggestions of activities parents can do with their child to help build strengths. At the very beginning of her book she admits to the frustrations parents feel and that’s an important reality check. As a child who grew up with undiagnosed ADD I know this book would have been beneficial if it had been available when I was growing up.
Reading Lara’s book and appreciating the fact someone was talking about parents being more involved with their children attracted me to Dr. Lara, Honos-Webb. She is a wonderful person and agreed immediately to read my book. She was excited. As she read it I worried that she would consider my book to be too distressing for parents and fellow ADDers to read, but I was wrong in my worries, after reading it she wrote me back that I should be so proud and gave me a beautiful quote from her to openly use which tells you what she thinks of “One Boy’s Struggle: A Memoir”
“Bryan’s memoir is riveting, engrossing – a crowd pleasing read. Heartbreaking at times, heartwarming at others, if you are looking for a guide through your own or your child’s ADHD, you’ll find it here. A delightful gem – not to be missed.”
Dr. Lara Honos-Webb, author the Gift of ADHD
I am very pleased that there is such a person as Dr. Lara, Honos-Webb who works tirelessly to create ADHD awareness and help parents realize that there are positive sides of ADHD which can be of benefit. She doesn’t try to make you believe that the struggles and frustrations do not exist, we all know they do, but there are good things too and she makes every effort to bring that message to parents and give them ideas and suggestions on how to bring the best out of their child and improve both the child’s self-esteem and the parents self-esteem, because guess what – parents suffer too.
There are plenty of dark clouds in the sky and it is nice to have a ray of sunshine breaking through. We all must learn to cope and overcome, there is no way around that, it might not be easy and actually it can be pretty damn hard at times. I talk about my struggles openly and honestly, if there had not been a few good people who came into my life with some sunshine I might not have made it this far. I write about those people in my memoir and how they helped me – they did not try to cover up that I had problems, but they did help me overcome those problems by giving positive, thoughtful advice. Too many of us get the poor you, your problems are too much and you will never overcome them. Dr. Lara Honos-Webb doesn’t do that, she gives positive, thoughtful advice and at the same time helps one overcome their personal struggles. As a psychologist she has witnessed the devastating effects of ADHD firsthand and has treated the traumas created by ADHD symptoms.
No, I still do not believe we can call ADHD a blessing yet; however, I do believe we have many gifts within the traits of ADHD and if we all come together, no matter our views and work together for understanding and awareness, maybe there will come a time when we can say ADHD is a blessing, but for right now, there is still a lot of work and healing to be done.
~Bryan
