A reader wrote me an interesting email about putting myself out there and that I would certainly receive backlash. “You can’t write openly about having ADD and get away with it!” The writer was sincere and had apparently received backlash.
First of all , I am not trying to get away with anything. I write to spread awareness and try to bring a little positivity and hope into the ADD ADHD scene, in my own, small way. Who would want to destroy me for that? Who would be so heartless and mean? Who is this phantom—this grim reaper? Na, I don’t want to know who it is. I would like to say though, despite a very few negative responses from those who do not believe ADD ADHD exists, feedback has been very positive and from sources some would say would be upset by it. Actually, being open about my situation has received praise in many areas that I would have never thought of before. There is good out there and if you believe in that, the good will find you—that is what I have learned to believe.
Why is that? Why would anyone be upset with someone because he or she has ADD ADHD, worked through difficulties and therefore tries to give a little light to others? Don’t worry that’s a rhetorical question, but think about it for a moment. Why—really? Very sad, indeed. Hopefully, we can get past that as a civilization and build each other up with support and love and mentorship and friendship.
Friendship is so very important and yet so many of us ADDers squander friendship without as much as a second thought. Would you like to know why I write, what gives me drive to write each and every day in some way? I am going to tell you, please continue if you would like to know…
I had a very good friend when I was a kid, I met him in the 3rd grade and he was my best friend all throughout my school years. I had a lot of problems, social problems and academic problems, other problems and most of the time I didn’t feel like I fit in. This friend, he was popular, charismatic and a very good person who always stayed my friend no matter what I said or did wrong. He stood by me through thick and thin. He was my idol. In many ways, he helped me through, he’s the one who introduced me to Billiards and even introduced me to girls. He had a lot of dreams and talked about them with me. He gave me a lot of ideas and showed me ways to get things done. He gave me drive and I didn’t have much drive as a kid.
Last year, I received a message from my sister letting me know that my best friend from childhood had passed away. He was the very best person in the world and I had not talked to him in nearly a decade. I felt so sad, so guilty and then I started to remember everything, every experience we had as kids. I wondered what had become of his dreams, his ideas and his happiness. Mostly, I remembered all the times he had picked me up when I was down; he was there, stretching out his hand. Yes, indeed, to me he was the absolute embodiment of a good person with more heart than he ever got credit for, and he never asked for credit or even considered it.
There is no way I can tell him how much he meant to me and to be honest with you, I never told him and I so wish I had been a better friend. I wasn’t there for him—I wasn’t there for a lot of people.
So yes, there might be cruel people out there, ready to pounce and destroy given the right opportunity, but you know what? There are good people out there too, even more so, those that want to stretch out a hand. My Blog and my book are written in the memory of my dear friend and this is my way to stretch out my hand–finally.
You can pour your soul out singin’
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they’ll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yeah sing it anyway
Martina McBride – Do it Anyway
~Best wishes to all~