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Adult ADHD can be Sexy? Really?
We ADDers have a unique way of thinking things through. We have a rare way of putting things together, of finding similarities between things or ideas that at first seem dissimilar or at least unlikely to be joined as an interesting concept. When the ADDer demonstrates how two vastly different notions can be connected the result can illuminate the possiblility of a completely new idea.
For ADDers being creative is more about the process of finding associations between things and ideas that come at them day to day at a frenetic pace in order to make sense of the fast paced life around them. ADDers are famous for thinking outside the box when they are asked for solutions to a problem or a new approach to an old idea or way of doing something. And yet, too often this wonderful trait to see, create and do things in unique new ways is disregarded in today’s world, even when it is obvious they work incredibly well.
I think, to simply say ADDers are creative is not enough. It’s much more than that.
When we ADDers succeed in bringing something new and useful to the table it is not always easy to reproduce by others, because, as I have pointed out, our thinking, the way we do things is unique, and of the individual, which is actually quite difficult to be replicated by just anyone else. This is then something we often call ‘talent’ because we know it cannot simply be copied and passed on from person to person to be duplicated indefinitely. Therein is our ultimate problem.
In the modern world ‘talent’ is less and less something to be admired and used as a resource. The reason is quite simple, the world itself seems to have become a representation of what most people on the outside of our reality consider to be an “ADHD world”, i.e. fast paced, unimaginative and always going, going, going. This is a laughable representation to me, because ADDers are the most imaginative, unique and creative people I have ever met.
The world has come to prize mass production and easily teachable methods, which have things moving in an ever quickening pace. Talent does not usually fit into the modern world unless you’re in sports, an entrepreneur or an artist, entertainer etc. However, take sports for example, less than 2% of high school athletes make it into pro sports. It’s easy to see why going in the direction of one’s talents is now typically discouraged and is deemed primarily useful only in hobbies, rather than as a true benefit for most people.
I believe that ADHD is a disorder to some extent because of the times we live in. I also think ADHD has always been around and will always be around, but I believe that in the past it wasn’t an unfavorable quality per se. Sitting in class most of the day with 30 other people is a product of the modern world, staying the course and being organized in every facet of one’s life is an imposed result of the modern world as well. All of these things and more, such as Ford’s creation of the assembly line, have had a profound effect on people who need time to process their thoughts in a non-methodical, non-linear, unorthodox, talented and creative manner.
The good news is we band together, we come up with solutions, we support each other and we make a way for each other. We can refuse to give in and give up.
I refuse to take my eyes off of the stars and I refuse to be lesser than I can be! We can all refuse acceptance to failure and defeat. Not only can we be more than we are given credit for, but we can also love and live fulfilling lives hopeful and joyful. Let no one take away from you the breath of life or the light of stars! Such defeat is not sexy, but hope is not lost, finding a way, creating a new path and overcoming can be sexy.
 Wonder how I came up with the idea that Adult ADHD can be Sexy? The thing is I have put two and two together that at first do not seem to add up. I have a talent for doing that, as do many of my fellow ADDers. Sexy and sexiness are to me positive affirmations that when put together with Adult ADHD deliver a unique and exceptional advantage, but there’s much more too it, of course.
We are in for a lot of delightful fun together, you and me; we walk together beating a new, positive, fulfilling, reach for the stars, path. It’s our world too, after all!
~Bryan
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ADD is sexy by definition.
Our special skill is actually emotional sensitivity. Sometimes that skill is too much for us and we act unskilfully- embark n foolish relationships, or get so overwhelmed with affect that we make errors of judgement.
Many of us experience so many reversals that we become emotionally defended. Do not be decieved. That is a crust hiding our true nature, and protecting us at times of excessive vulnerability.
Reply to Andrew KinsellaAt heart though, our way is the way of the heart. Love and sex are at the core of that. When we embrace our true nature, nobody makes a better lover than an awakened attention difference person.