Lately I have been reading a lot about the strength based approach to managing, coping and, more importantly, striving and thriving with ADHD! It’s a contagious, positive and wonderful new movement and I like to think I have been a small part of helping push this movement into the forefront by writing my blog, my books and eBooks.
I really like his use of ADHD! It’s a new way of looking at ADHD. We can talk about the difficulties, the challenges and the disadvantages of ADHD all day long. We can read about and study what the science tells us and what the statistics show us, but there’s one thing I have noticed, and that is that those who believe in and live by their strengths, whereby one uses what they can do well to their advantage seem to be happier and live more fulfilling lives.
This is a very special announcement. I have a new book coming out in a couple short weeks. It is my labor of love, the grandest adventure and the most ambitious writing I have endeavored since One Boy’s Struggle: A Memoir. The title of my new book is 7 Crucial Tips for Parents and Teachers of Children with ADHD. Don’t let the title fool you though, this new book will be just as important a read for adults with ADHD as it is for parents and teachers. I would even go so far as calling it my Manifesto – at least, that’s what my wife is calling it.
The new book shares with readers what I consider the 7 most crucial tips for parents and teachers. Because of how serious I am about this new book I asked two professional therapists (who you may have heard of) to write Forewords to this new book! You will read them soon.
I have an extremely vivid imagination. As a child with undiagnosed ADD (ADHD) I used my imagination to escape to somewhere better, somewhere I was special and where I felt appreciated. In my first book One Boy’s Struggle: A Memoir, I wrote of how I imagined I was Commander Mart, a superhero who flew through the skies on the back of a beautiful, incredible flying silver horse I named Pegasus! In my imagination I felt good about myself, I felt whole and I felt well.
The thing is though, sometimes my imagination got me into a lot of trouble because I would escape into it whenever I was bored, uninspired or when I was under pressure and scared. I didn’t know it then, but I used my imagination as a survival skill. I felt comfortable in my imagination, I was in control there and nobody could hurt me because I was Commander Mart and I could fly away on Pegasus.
In the last few years I have read thousands of emails from readers all over the world. Many love what I have written and thank me for going out on a ‘limb’ to share my life experiences. You, the readers are my driving source for writing, sharing and you inspire me to keep on keeping on, to continue sharing – it’s a very positive, uplifting and learning experience each time I read a letter or email from someone that has been touched by my writing. And what’s just as special is our ADDer World Social Network is nearing 2000 members! Originally, I had foreseen a couple dozen members of blog readers where we could get together and communicate a bit easier. Seems I am not the only one interested in finding a positive outlook, no, not by far and that’s awesome! Together we are never alone, no, never alone and finding ways to move forward positively, constructively and manipulate our experiences to our wants, needs and desires, ever hopeful and encouraging each other. That, my friends, is what it is all about. Ecouraging each other, motivating each other and, giving each other hope in the midst of the fog. There’s enough discouragement in the world already.
With that said, from time to time I receive a frustrated email, comment or letter. Some are quite angry, in fact. These types of emails seem to have one connecting factor: Positivity. Many of the writers are simply frustrated that thinking positive doesn’t work for them and yet, there are others, who are simply angry that anything positive is being connected to ADHD in any way whatsoever. Some of the latter emails try their most to get me to change my perspective and see how doomed we are because we have ADHD and that life with it will always be chaos and ruin. Uh… no. And then there are other emails I get where I pay a little less attention to because there seems to be some kind of ulterior, hostile motive that I don’t fully understand. Tip to any would be writers in this category. Insulting emails are never successful and I am not available for debate, but you can debate with yourself all you like or someone else.
Have you noticed that adult ADHD is making more news lately? As a matter of fact I just read that approximately 65% of children with ADHD will grow into adults with ADHD, or rather ADD. I personally suspect that the percentage is much higher. It’s impossible to know how many adults are wondering around undiagnosed, but it’s estimated to be in the millions. I was diagnosed when I was 37 and in recent years I have met a remarkable number of adults diagnosed at a later age, some cases much later. This of course lends to the belief that ADHD isn’t real. How can so many people have it? I don’t know, but we do.
People of all ages are going to fall to peer pressure, both the good and the bad kind. Yes, there is a good kind of peer pressure, which will enable a person to achieve something better for themselves and possibly for a group. Then there is the bad kind of peer pressure which usually involves getting into some kind of mischief or doing something which one will eventually regret. There are plenty of definitions out there, so I am not going to try and explain all of the types and ways peer pressure exists.
Here’s a top ten list I have put together of things to do and NOT do with your ADHD partner:
Do not:
Do not play parent (motherly or fatherly)
Do not take on the sole responsibility of trying to correct his or her behavior
Do not blame every aspect of the relationship which might be damaged on his or her ADHD
Do not make statements which are demeaning with the hope that it will spark his or her attention that they must make corrective efforts.
Do not say things like: “This is the right way to do this or that.” Or “That’s not the way things should be done.”
Do not take his or her hyper focusing on projects or people, places or things personally. Hyper focusing is not about your relationship directly or indirectly, it’s a difficult to control or much less, predict, trait of ADHD.
"One Boy’s Struggle is a real eye-opener. It should be read by all parents struggling to understand how best to support their ADHD children. Adults with ADHD will likely find validation and new hope from reading Bryan’s story.” ~Dr. Edward Hallowell
CHADD Educator of the Year for 2010, Dr. Katherine Nell Mcneil, "Highly recommends" One Boy’s Struggle
“A very brave and moving memoir.” Pulitzer Prize winning journalist, Katherine Ellison, author of 'Buzz'.
"Gripping account of both the struggles and positive polarities of ADD written beautifully in a honest, open and courageous manner." David A. Crenshaw, Ph.D.
"Anyone with ADD or with friends, loved ones or colleagues with ADD will be informed and touched by Bryan’s book." Bryan Robinson Ph.D. author of 'The Art of Confident Living'
Thank you!
It is an honor to have written a book that is meaning so much and benefiting so many. It is my hope that one day ‘One Boy’s Struggle: A Memoir’ will be read by every teacher and parent, as well as read by every adult with ADHD. If you own a copy and have read it, please consider passing it on, loan it out to friends, a support group or donating it to your local library.
All material provided within this website is opinion only, and is not to be construed as medical advice, instruction or direction of any kind. No action should be taken solely on the contents of this website. Visit a health care professional before making any decisions about your health.
